Selena's Side

HATS!

2008-09-06T21:34:00.001-05:00

HATS!
Originally uploaded by Sseymou1

Che is obsessed with hats.....and everything becoming a hat. His favorite is a Cool Whip container. He wouldn't leave the zoo until Papa had one too.
Of course, Che chose the brightest one for his Papa. :)

Off to school

2008-09-06T21:29:00.002-05:00

IMG_2577
Originally uploaded by Sseymou1

Che has started Montessori school. I'm teaching middle school (yes, they are weird but I'm actually enjoying it). Ross is still working from his little office upstairs.

Life is good right now. Really good. We love it here.

I realize that he just turned two but we are having soooo much fun! He is amazing. He is obsessed with the alphabet and loves to sing. He still talks very little (intelligibly, that is) but what he needs to tell us - he usually does. Have I mentioned that he is amazing.

He peed!!!

2008-06-20T19:06:00.003-05:00

I know one day he will die when he realizes that I have shared this with the world but he peed on his little singing potty today!
I was so shocked. He shut the door and sat down with a very serious look on his face and just peed. Amazing what excites me these days. That little bugger is just pretty damn amazing.
The end to a pretty good week.

I'll discuss the "cole slaw" incident later....right now I want to sit on our porch and enjoy a cold beer on a summer night with Che sleeping soundly.

Futbol star in Chattanooga

2008-06-08T12:02:00.002-05:00

We are settling in to our new house. It's nice after a month of Che and I living in Atlanta and Ross living in Chattanooga to finally be under the same roof. Now, let the unpacking begin!

Che seems to be really happy here too. I think we all forgot how much we like big yards (thank God for a lawn service!), mountains, and the lack of crackheads on corners.

Ross picked up this soccer outfit on one of his trips to Birmingham (the England variety not the Alabama one). You say it much fancier.

Our new house!

2008-05-01T18:25:00.002-05:00

We are in the process of moving to Chattanooga. We are really excited!

Big boy dinner

2008-02-18T21:13:00.001-05:00

IMG_1913
Originally uploaded by Sseymou1

Life goes fast

2008-02-18T21:04:00.002-05:00

Che is running EVERYWHERE and starting to talk. He has such a fun personality.

What a difference a year makes.

2007-12-15T21:31:00.001-05:00

Wow, way too tired to post. Ross has been in England for a week and being a single working mom is...insane. Just wanted you to know that things are going great and Che gets funnier, smarter and cuter every day. Look out world.

My tiny toddler

2007-11-04T08:22:00.001-05:00

IMG_1589
Originally uploaded by Sseymou1

We're back to sleepless nights. He has 2 molars coming in - we had a grand total of 2 weeks where he slept - maybe - 12 out of 14 nights.
We're still trying to sell our house - ugh. We're planning to take it off the market during the holidays and try again in the spring.

This is an unusual shot of him actually walking solo. Typically, he falls down into his high speed crawl or needs me nearby to go vertical.

Isn't he tiny and cute?

He took his first steps!

2007-10-29T07:59:00.000-05:00

He took 3 steps right after we finished carving the pumpkins.

One more ...just because he's so dang cute

2007-10-14T09:29:00.000-05:00

¡No Me Gusta!

2007-10-14T09:28:00.001-05:00

New Mode of Transportation

2007-10-14T09:17:00.000-05:00

Realizing I haven't posted in 2 months.....
We have changed daycare to one very near our house. Ross has a new job and will be working from home - so, with my job being 3 miles from home and Ross' being in the home - seems ridiculous to drive downtown to take him to daycare. Plus, we (or I) were having "issues" with his teacher and her lack of supervision of the six ONE YEAR OLDS!?! Anyway, I'm very happy with his current situation.
We are trying to sell our house and move closer to Ross' mom. With him working from home, we have that flexibility. Plus, Chattanooga is beautiful and seems a great place to raise a little one. The big glaring problem? WE NEED TO SELL OUR HOUSE! Know anyone looking for a great restored 3/1 in downtown Atlanta? We love our house and have worked very hard to restore it but we need family. It's really hard to raise a baby without any family around. We need a grandma.
Here are some pictures of Che's new ride to daycare. He has a terrible haircut....someone who obviously did not know how to cut straight black hair.

Happy 1st Birthday!

2007-08-07T20:58:00.001-05:00

IMG_1197
Originally uploaded by Sseymou1

It's really tomorrow but life is busy...just in case...I'll post it tonight.

It will be his 3rd day of daycare. So far he seems to love it...and it makes him really tired! YAY for consecutive hours of sleep.
We're pretty sure he's really close to walking - he can pull up and everyone in his class is walking.

He's a really happy funny baby who crawled to us when we came to pick him up. I had a deep fear that he wouldn't want to come home with us....I was wrong. Daycare seems to be much harder on me than on him.

Summer and My BFF

2007-07-20T11:10:00.001-05:00

Weird drool

2007-07-20T10:48:00.001-05:00

Standing up

2007-07-20T10:45:00.000-05:00

No post in over a month....

2007-07-20T10:41:00.001-05:00

This will clean up, right?
Originally uploaded by Sseymou1

Dang. Not much to say.
Life is happy and busy.
Che is a fabulous little guy who is crawling and just learned how to pull up by himself.
He's still tiny and I obsess over that but overall he seems happy and healthy and I need to let the size thing go.
We've had a lot of work done to our house and we've done a lot of work. It's really hard with a crawling 11 month old to get anything done much less home remodeling.
I am going back to school August 6th and that will be Che's first day of daycare. Ross is dropping him off....I just can't. I really think he will like it but it's going to be so hard to leave him.
His first birthday is coming up and we plan to have a little party at my parent's house in West Tn - blue plastic pool and all!

Yesterday was my birthday and I realized that my life is in a very happy place and that I really didn't feel a need to "do anything special" because really my life is "special." Ross and I just spent the evening hanging out w/ Che and the furkids and of course, ate wings! I'm married to my best friend and we have a great kid, pets and life overall. Cheers to being 31.

Father's Day

2007-06-18T09:01:00.001-05:00

my boys
Originally uploaded by Sseymou1

I was lucky enough to get to spend Father's day with my dad and Ross.
They are the 2 best dads in the whole world. No joke.
Both of them are patient, kind and fun.

Ross flew in from Amsterdam yesterday as my mom and dad were flying home.

Raised by not-so-wild dogs

2007-06-06T08:54:00.001-05:00

The family bed
Originally uploaded by Sseymou1

I realize it has been a long time since I have posted anything. Thankfully, school is out and I have a bit more time (assuming Che is on his regularly scheduled but not so regularly taken naps). It's really nice that Ross and I see each other again. Hats off to the single moms and dads. Ross and I are back in bed together and Che is in the crib -in the bouncy seat in the crib- but nonetheless, in the crib. His room is attached to ours (you must walk through the nursery to get to our room) so that helps. He seems to sleep better this way.
Che is becoming quite the little character. So far, 9-10 months is my favorite. He does so many funny tricks.

Che barks.

He communicates to the dogs with this "huh" sound. They bark and he says "huh" back. They look confused and he seems baffled that they are not understanding him. Shouldn't he try talking to humans? Probably. However, his parents have misanthropic tendencies and we talk to the dogs. When he howls at firetrucks along with Ava - that's when we need to start scheduling play dates (ick. I cringe at that term "play date").

¡Feliz dia de las Madres!

2007-05-13T07:34:00.000-05:00

Our first mother's day! Granted, Che didn't care and woke up at 7:30, as usual, but at least I'm up now to make breakfast.

¡Later, Bloody Marys in the park!

This picture was taken on our visit trip over Thanksgiving and, to me, completely embodies Selena as a mother. That is to say, perfect.

Grandma

2007-05-08T21:16:00.000-05:00

When I close my eyes and think of my Grandma Evelyn I think of colors. Not pastel "grandma" colors but bright, loud colors. Nothing polite about them.
I see brightly colored quilts blowing in the wind on a clothes line. The fresh air is mingled with a slightly pungent hog odor - not terrible- just...real.
I see bright yellow buttercups and glowing orange tiger lilies growing on the bank of her yard.
I smell cornbread and country ham.
I see red. She loved red.
Her cards and letters were full of colorful images and her conversations were nothing but colorful. She was never afraid to speak what she thought. Nothing polite about that either.
She was the most real person that I have ever known.
She let me dance on the dusty floor wearing the fanciest most colorful clothes she could find. Nothing wrong with sitting on a quilt to have a picnic that took her and Granny and Maggie a year to make. Nothing wrong with muddying up the bottom of a new skirt to catch brown frogs in the creek.
What else would you use a new beautiful red head scarf for than to walk to the outhouse in the rain?
Her best bowl was perfect for crouching under the cherry tree and picking cherries.
What is there to be afraid of?
Could a little girl grown up be any luckier to have her as a grandmother?
No.
The world is better because you were here.

Off to work I go.

2007-04-18T18:54:00.000-05:00

Blah.
Monday I go back to work.
Don't get me wrong I love my job, I really do. It's an exhausting job but the kids are great and I know they really need me to be there and teaching (HIGH SCHOOL, only) is really fun. But...blah. I will finish out this year as department chair but I will *not* do that again next year. Seriously, teachers are some of the worst people to supervise (sorry to all of the teachers that are reading, no offense) or maybe it's just my department. They have made my job miserable and I like the core reponsibility of my job - teaching - I'm not going to let them ruin that for me. It will be hard enough to leave Che daily.

We're really lucky because Ross is going to work from home until I am out for the summer. Of course, we'll probably never see each other - he is going to work while I am at home in the afternoons and weekends. However, for bonding purposes, it is an excellent arrangement and I'm trying to focus on that. It's a great opportunity for the two of them. At times I feel bitter b/c we live in a place and work in places that do not give you a break for raising a baby (not to mention as teachers in Georgia we do not get ANY paid leave for babies - adopted or not)- but what good does that do?
Simple fact, I am going back to work [period].

But after a day in the park with a bucket of KFC, it's a hard act to follow...there's always the summer.

Whatever works!

2007-04-02T18:34:00.000-05:00

That's our new motto.
Things I've learned about Che and Mama-hood so far. These are in no particular order.
1. Che is the cutest.
2. Feeding is messy and sneezing makes it messier
3. Wherever/however he will sleep works for all of us.
4. My finger *will* end up in the poop.
5. Dance-feeding to Rodrigo y Gabriela really works!
6. It's amazing what you will do to make him laugh.
7. Che laughing is better than any sound in the whole world. Conversely, his crying is the worst.
8. Figuring everything out is going to take a lifetime of trial and error.
9. Baby books (especially Dr. Sears') are great but they're not magic.
10. Look at the consignment shop first.
11. Yes, we have an exersaucer (swore we never would) and we think his messy eating pictures are adorable (swore we wouldn't do that either). Never say never.
12. Babywearing beats the hell out of strollers, shopping cart covers, etc.
13. Che is not on our schedule we are on his. He will *not* wait for us to finish checking our email, listening to one last song, dinner (!!), calling ____, or a blog posting.

More later....

Quick picture

2007-03-27T20:42:00.000-05:00

I'm not going to lie - we are exhausted.
But it is very worth it and we're so happy he is home and currently (for now) sleeping safely in his bed...in our house. :)

Pinch me.

2007-03-05T22:04:00.001-05:00

Che and Mollie
Originally uploaded by inkcow.

He's home and he is perfect.

Could we be any luckier? No.

This picture was taken after a long plane ride, immigration wait, lack of sleep, and a cold - I wish my attitude was half as good as his. :)

We're having a baby!

2007-02-22T21:40:00.000-05:00

Next week!

We are going to pick him up. We should be home next Friday.

It's so....shocking....and surreal.

Out!

2007-02-11T10:33:00.000-05:00

Che's out of PGN! We got the call on Thursday night (Selena screamed so loud while listening to the voice mail that I nearly had a heart attack). He should be home in two to three weeks!

Of course, we still need to use ambiguous terms like 'should' because he's still not home, but he's close (and, should we decide to move to Guatemala, we're already set).

We should get word of when our 'pick-up date' is next week or the week after (they can give you anywhere from a week to 48 hours notice) and then we go down and get him! We haven't decided if we might want to go down a day or two early to see a bit of Guatemala before we take him to the embassy. A lot of it depends on how much lead time there is when we get the call, naturally.

Yesterday, in a panic, we went to buy all the things we still need to be ready for him to come home. The baby section at Target still overwhelms me and will obviously be an ongoing problem I need to overcome :)

Hurry up and wait

2007-02-02T19:26:00.000-05:00

When is he coming home?
Um....I have no idea. I thought we would know by now. I thought we would be buying our tickets and planning to go and pick him up. I thought wrong.
No word.
We really just need one man's signature.

How long have we been waiting for just that one signature?
80 days

6,912,000 seconds
115,200 minutes
1920 hours
11+ weeks

It's really hard. Really.

One More

2007-01-27T12:13:00.001-05:00

Mario3
Originally uploaded by Sseymou1.

Couldn't resist.

OMG - our little man!

2007-01-27T12:08:00.000-05:00

PLEASE, please Mr. PGN man sign our little Che out!

We found out we received another kick out and we were re-entered 12/18/06.
It sets us back a couple of weeks but we've still done our time.

Waiting on the phone call......

Let's hear it for the boys.

2007-01-27T12:03:00.001-05:00

Picture 131
Originally uploaded by Sseymou1.

¡Fiesta!

2007-01-27T12:01:00.001-05:00

Picture 134
Originally uploaded by Sseymou1.

We had a great "fiesta" to celebrate Che's impending arrival.
Thanks especially to Mary, L3 y Damon, Stew y Kat!

It is so nice to have friends that are excited and supportive of our little family.

Ladies, co-ed showers w/ margaritas and planter's punch are *much* more fun than teacakes, mints, and fruit punch! Although, a pinata in the park (although, admittedly fun) in the hood was a little unnerving. :-)

Still waiting

2007-01-03T11:28:00.000-05:00

We have a shower this afternoon with Ross' co-workers. It is such a great feeling to have so much support.
I still feel like we are jinxing everything by assuming he is going to come home.
But he is going to come home....right?
I'm sure the margaritas will calm me down. That is definitely an upside to adopting compared to having a baby the "old-fashioned way".

Case update....still just waiting.....

Here's another picture from our trip - gosh, I hope we get to hold him again soon.

PGN! We're finally there...the black hole...

2006-12-20T22:10:00.000-05:00

It's a weird process. Last month, I was freaking out because we were not in pgn...now we know we are in (not sure of exact date) but we've already been kicked out and re-entered.
Our re-entry date was 12/12.

What does this mean? Well...we still wait....we hope that Mr. Barrios (PGN main dude) decides our case looks like the one he wants to sign that day and we will be on our merry way. If not, we wait until it looks good enough. ??
Here's a link to the process if you are interested.

We are expecting to exit pgn in 6-8 wks if things go well. After that, we will work on the Visa part again and hopefully - best case scenario he will be home in February.

It has been very difficult to meet, fall in love and then leave him in Guatemala. I feel like I left Guatemala a mother and in the states I'm still just "Selena-not-a-mom-yet". However, I feel very changed. Guess you can't see it. :) One day very soon, I will have him attached to me in his mayan wrap...and then you will see...you will know.

Surviving Che

2006-11-30T21:17:00.000-05:00

100_1244
Originally uploaded by Sseymou1.

He is amazingly beautiful and it was so difficult to leave him.
We really really hope he is home soon.

It was not easy to take care of a 3month old in a hotel room in a foreign county....but we all survived.

More later....

The meeting

2006-11-21T21:18:00.000-05:00

Okay, here we go.

TOMORROW (I don't take caps lightly) we are leaving for Guatemala.
How....strange and exciting.

Many moments of "What the hell are we doing?!?"

We'll keep you posted (pun definitely intended).

Oops...forgot the new picture!

2006-11-01T20:42:00.000-05:00

¿que pasa?

2006-11-01T20:35:00.000-05:00

Well...our DNA matched - meaning, the baby and the birthmom have the same DNA - good news.

Sad news - the picture of the birthmom and Che. She looks so sad. However, it strengthens my resolve to be a really good mom to him.

We have no idea regarding the etiquette of baby showers and adoption. We welcome suggestions (particularly, when?). We have registered at Target and another place - for fun.

Our registries are by no means complete and advice is definitely welcome!

I'd rather have a frontal lobotomy

2006-10-24T11:58:00.000-05:00

Than be stuck in that aisle in Target(tm) looking at all those freaking bottles/nipples/drop-ins/you-name-it again.

When we were Che's age, we drank from discarded Ripple bottles or whatever else was lying around! Didn't we?

So, yeah, the consumer culture surrounding parenthood is a bit overwhelming right now.

A bit of news

2006-10-23T19:31:00.000-05:00

We found out today that our Family Court interviews with the assigned social worker took place on 10.11. That's good news.
I'm stalking the mailman....I want those DNA results!

We bought bottles and formula this weekend to "practice" for our Thanksgiving trip.
We are both a tad scared of them and they are still sitting in the kitchen.

What are we doing?!? We've started reading Dr. Sears' book. Hopefully, that will help.

OMG and what about diapers? Are they difficult to figure out?

Ross thinks he can handle it. I'm not so confident.

I'll post the flow chart - that might help you. It definitely does me.

The Panic Room

2006-10-12T18:47:00.000-05:00

Ross + Selena + Che + Alone together + Hotel room in Guatemala = PANIC.

Okay, here is our timeline simplified (and another pic b/c he's so damn cute!):
3.20.06 - Signed w/agencies
3.24.06 - I600-A submitted
4.11.06 - Started dossier
4.13.06 - Fingerprint appt USCIS
5.23 - Home study completed!
6.17 - Homestudy submitted to USCIS
6.29 - Dossier received in SC
9.6 - Referral of Che
9.14 - I-171H
9.18.06 - DNA paid for and faxed
9.19.06 - POA arrived in Guatemala
9.28.06 - DNA auth denied
10.4.06 - DNA auth
10.4.06 - Filed @ US Embassy
10.11.06 - DNA samples received at lab

Have we lost you?

2006-10-12T18:28:00.000-05:00

I know, I know we have been very negligent. There's been a lot of running around and freaking out...oh, yeah, and my new ridiculously stressful position at school and Ross busy "developing" away.

We got our I-171H from Atlanta - FINALLY!
We also received new pictures.

Our Power of Attorney was done and fedex'ed to Guatemala. Get this, so far the only snafu we have hit (knock on a big piece of wood!) was the US gov't. We submitted a form that had to be re-done b/c it was not typed. Of course, it was not made to be typed on and there was no indication it should be. Well, $65 later (the cost to fedex one piece of paper to Guat) and a lot of stress and heartache that we prolonged Che coming home....DNA authorization was approved and the samples are at the lab.

Why is the DNA being completed a big deal? Well, the DNA test requires the mother to hold the baby and if she is going to change her mind, this is usually when she does it. Can you imagine how painful this must be? I absolutely cannot imagine.
She has not seen him since birth. There will also be a social worker interview conducted with the mother - hopefully, soon.

The other exciting news - we have purchased plane tickets, reserved the room, and reserved a spot for the furkids at the Barking Hound Lofts for Thanksgiving!
Hopefully, our DNA test will be back and the mother and baby will match.

Did I mention Ross won a contest and it is just enough $ to get us to Guatemala and back?
Blessing? I think so.

I'll do better, ya'll. I promise.

Thanks for coming back.

Oh! My! Goodness!

2006-09-06T21:50:00.000-05:00

che1
Originally uploaded by inkcow.

So, uh, we got our referral today...

OH MY GOD LOOK AT HIM!

Yeah, so we're a little excited.

DO YOU SEE HOW FREAKING CUTE HE IS?!

This is Mario, better known as Che.

At this point, we'll probably just keep Mario (of course, he'll still be Che). We don't have to worry about that just yet.

He's about a month old.

AND MY GOD HE'S SO CUTE.

No, our paperwork still hasn't gotten through USCIS (WHAT THE HELL ARE THEY DOING?! DON'T THEY SEE HOW CUTE HE IS?!), and when it finally gets through that, we've got to wait for Guatemala, but this is who we've been referred (and happily accepted) and we're just as excited as can be right now.

Take a look at the whole set of pictures.

A post to keep you up to date - not much happenin'.

2006-07-23T13:13:00.000-05:00

We have a new furkid - Ichabod. We call him Icky or Uncle Icky.
Ava and Icky are totally BFF. Who knew this was possible?

Well, I am 30 and I had a really nice birthday - thanks ya'll. I have to say one of the very coolest gifts was a Che onesie! Rick and Jenny you rock!

On the adoption front - NOTHING - still waiting for Atlanta's USCIS. They are just now processing I-600As from May 1st. I'm not sure why in the world this takes so long.... but...nothing I can do about it. So, we'll wait.

Turning 30 with my comrade.

2006-07-07T12:54:00.000-05:00

My 30th birthday is rapidly approaching. I've been trying to decide what, if anything, that means.
I don't feel particularly excited nor depressed just somewhere in the middle - reflective, I think. 30 makes me think about where I've been and where I'm going. My 20's haven't been so easy. I've made TONS of mistakes and would never want to go back to 20 and do it again. At times, it's been rough. Not all bad, obviously, I met and married Ross (and not just because he's part of this blog) but that was definitely the highlight of my 20's. Moving to NY was a good one too.
However, at 29 approaching 30, I'm sitting on the edge of motherhood and that's pretty frightening for obvious reasons.

I'm lucky, though, to have my 20's comrade. I thought she was a "companion" but I didn't like the definition. She's an "intimate friend"; a comrade. I call her my furkid but she's really more than that. She's lived through all the fun and all the tragedy - and roommates, friends, boyfriends, jobs, apartments, houses, school, other dogs, cats, etc. And she's still with me. She's curled up on my pillow every night snoring away. She's slowing down a bit. She has a tough time getting up and keeping up. She frequently falls asleep outside the bathroom door on guard duty and we often have to step over her. Right now, she's snoozing away under my feet. Where she's been for the past 10 years.

So, on July 19, when I'm celebrating my 30th birthday, I truly owe my thanks to Mollie - my comrade. I couldn't ask for a better intimate friend.

WE FEDEX'ed OUR DOSSIER TODAY!!!

2006-06-28T21:22:00.000-05:00

The visit to the Consulate was MUCH better today. Only one family was there and the man in the window was very nice (different man, and I believe this man was Guatemalan - by the way he spoke and looked). He spoke to me in Spanish and I understood everything. Whew!
I received our authenticated documents and went home to make copies of everything and then Fedex'ed them to South Carolina.
I feel so relieved.
Now, we just wait for our I-171H from Atlanta's USCIS.

I went to my Spanish class tonight. More on that later.....

Good night.

A dilemma with probably no solution

2006-06-28T18:55:00.000-05:00

While I was in New Orleans last weekend for ALA, I realized that not only do most of the people I know not know that we're adopting, I have no idea how to bring it up.

It isn't that I'm embarrassed or uncomfortable with the adoption, it's just a weird thing to bring up out of the blue. "Hey, have you seen the video where the Comcast guy falls asleep on the couch? By the way, I'm adopting a child from Guatemala." "Yes, I think it's a very good idea to load our electronic journal titles in our catalog. Not to completely change the subject, but my wife and I are adopting a child from Guatemala."

I imagine every expectant father has this issue. You're not keeping it from people, but you don't want it to be a big deal, either. The obvious difference between adoption and having a child naturally, of course, is that Selena's going through this, too.

I realized how awkward this was on Sunday night at the Ex Libris reception when my friend Carol overheard me telling somebody that I didn't even know about Che. I talk to Carol nearly every day. She had no idea. I don't think she was upset or anything, but she was totally taken by surprise. At the same time, since I primarily communicate with her via IM, email or blog comments, how do you bring this up out of the blue?

I think approaching these more casual relationships is difficult. Friends that I mainly communicate with electronically, former coworkers that I still keep in touch with (or run into), drinking buddies, all of the above -- none of these are friendships that I'm ever terribly "serious" or "open" in. Unless conversation just so happens to go in a direction that is relevant for bringing it up, it feels awkward and contrived to just "bring it up". Like an alcoholic that's on the step where they have to "apologize to all the people they've hurt". Both parties are at a loss as to what to say next and I think person on the "receiving end" has the even more uncomfortable burden of having to react to something that's roughly akin to seeing a shrubbery grow out of my forehead. I think "fatherhood" seems pretty out of character with my "public persona".

On the flip side, it'll be even more awkward when they see me with my "wheat colored baby".

The Guatemalan Consulate Visit.

2006-06-26T14:35:00.000-05:00

Today, I took all of our dossier documents FINALLY to the Consulate of Guatemala (after I took them to various County Clerks and to the Secretary of State). First, let me say, after spending $10 per document for the SOS and then $10 per doc for the Consulate - this is becoming a very expensive week.
The Consulate is in the Latin American Association building on Buford Hwy. Luckily, we live about 15 minutes from there. The documents are valuable enough to me, that I wanted to take them personally and then pick them back up. So, I get there and the parking spaces and arrows are insane! I teach high school and adult English language learners - predominantly Latin American, so I am familiar with this sort of organization (or in my eyes, lack of) and it made me smile.
I walked in and the front desk people were very helpful and friendly and they directed me to the Consulate.

I got to the door and heard a lot of excited chattering inside - in Spanish, of course. I walked in and everyone just stopped and stared! I should add here, I am very white - very pale with dark blonde hair and blue eyes. Ummmm..... No one said a word and when they did, it was only to whisper to one another. There were 20+ Guatemalans and no one would speak. There was some type of line...I think. So, I stood behind seemingly the last lady in line. Again, the "organization" was a bit haphazard for my Caucasian-American standards. I realized, after standing there for about 10 minutes, I needed to ask someone where line was or if they were in line....uh oh. Here is where I am with Spanish - I can read instructions and such pretty well, I can understand- if they are from a country that I hear a lot (except Cuban Spanish, it seems too fast for my ears), I can write elementary sentences correctly but conversations scare the crap out of me. As an ELL teacher, we call this the "silent period" that is where I am.

Internal dialogue: Okay, to wait is esperar- I think - ¿cómo se dice waiting? Who am I going to ask?
I can figure this out - -ing is usually -ando... are you? ¿usted esperando?
Okay, maybe that's right.

I asked the lady who was in front of me - ¿Usted esperando? She smiled and said, "Sí."

Internal: Great, now I know she is waiting - if she understood me maybe I said it wrong and she is just being nice. EVERYONE is staring at me now. But isn't everyone waiting? Okay, what is line - línea - en línea? or is that 'on line'? AAH! I should just leave and mail it in. No, my students go through this everyday, I'm sure it's "good for me" to experience this. I start sweating - I've got to do something, I've been here for quite awhile now... It really is hot in here. Isn't it?

Finally, I just cut line because it seems there is no definite line. Of course, everyone is still staring. I smiled at everyone and went to the window - I asked in English because I felt that it was expected and I was already unnerved enough.
Me: May I leave these documents to have them authenticated?
Man behind glass: Get back in line!
Me: I don't know where the line is.
Man: I need to finish with this man.
Me: Okay, I'm so sorry. (I smiled to man waiting and mumbled lo siento) He smiled back.
Man: Miss, where are your documents.
At this point, a girl jumped in front of me to ask a question and he barked something at her and she went and sat down. She smiled apologetically at me and I back at her.
Man: Come back on Wednesday.

One thing I love about Latin American cultural, generally, is people are very friendly and helpful - and very forgiving when you butcher their language. Sure the parking and lines and such are mayhem and maybe no one will be there on time....but they are nice people and I look forward to trying to instill this attitude in little Che. Hopefully, I will be able to leave a little bit of the pushy, time conscious part of my culture behind - or at least allow it to slide from time to time.

However, I pretty much dread going back on Wednesday. I am meeting my Spanish tutor Wednesday night - I haven't met with her since October. My students always help me say what I need to - I've learned a lot from them. Much more than words. One day, one day, I will be unafraid to speak in another language....maybe.

When will Che arrive? (another)

2006-06-21T21:16:00.000-05:00

Here's what must happen first - we must receive our I-171H first from the Atlanta USCIS office (aka "Immigration"). Once upon a time, this only took 2 weeks, now, it seems more like 6-8 but this is still an estimate - maybe sooner (hopefully), maybe later. Once we receive our approval from the US government, we will more than likely, receive our referral almost immediately. We are open to a boy or girl (girls take longer). When we receive our referral we either accept or reject the baby. Assuming we accept, (to make a long story short), we enter into the court system in Guatemala. They conduct birth mother interviews, a DNA match (we also like this part to avoid "baby selling"), a review of our documents, and other court proceedings. This typically takes 4-6 months, although this may vary as well.
In other words, we may have a baby as early as December or as late as spring. Does that help?
We'll update with more specifics as we hit various time markers.

Why Guatemala? (more FAQs)

2006-06-21T19:55:00.000-05:00

The main reason is once we receive and accept a referral, the baby goes to a foster mother and is not in an orphanage; the foster mother is approved by our placement agency and the medical care is also overseen by our agency. Therefore, the baby will receive care, from birth, that is "up to American standards". We will have the opportunity to visit Guatemala, which is only a 3 1/2 hour flight from Atlanta, and possibly meet the birth mother from the time of referral (typically the baby's birth) before we bring Che home forever. It also helps that I am familiar with Guatemalan culture and I actually know Guatemalan people. We felt this was important. It is a fairly quick process (relatively speaking) from referral to bringing Che home.
Feel free to post any more questions.

The Commie Kid

2006-06-20T20:46:00.000-05:00

By the way, our "project name" for this kid is "Che" (as in Guevara), so if you hear us refer to "Che", well, that's what we're talking about.

Little history lesson, before he went to Mexico and helped plan the Cuban revolution from there, Guevara was in Guatemala during the Socialist years there (before the U.S. backed coup).

¡Viva la revolución!

FAQ's (you know, the uncomfortable ones)

2006-06-20T17:33:00.000-05:00

Okay, I'll start.
The ones we have heard the most:
Is international adoption expensive? Of course it is! However, we end up with a beautiful baby.
Shouldn't that cost a lot? Exactly how much - it's hard to say. Including travel, postage (this adds up quickly), attorney fees, social worker fees, immigration documents, foster care for the baby for several months, medical expenses, etc. I would estimate it is costing us around $35k.

I have heard this one in all kinds of thinly veiled disguises:
Can you not have children? (gulp) There it is - the "mother" of all don't ask adoption questions.
Sure we are state approved to have children- we have even been to classes, been interviewed, our house inspected, pets inspected, jobs and finances evaluated, etc - what about you?
That's my response to people when I know they are being nasty.

However, for you, my friends and family....here's what you want to know....
We have had some difficulties conceiving and carrying to term "naturally." We have always wanted to adopt so we didn't investigate any medical interventions. This seems to be the right path for us. That does not mean that I think there is anything wrong with medical interventions, in fact, I think they are wonderful and amazing but it's not right for us.
On the money front (to all of you still hung up on the 35k from the previous question), with state insurance in the good ol' US - "medical interventions" will also cost you......a lot.

Here we are on a literal level.

2006-06-20T12:29:00.000-05:00

3.20 - Signed w/agencies -We have an adoption placement agency and a separate homestudy
agency. Our homestudy agency must be in Georgia.
3.24 - I600-A submitted - Orphan petition for USCIS (aka INS aka "Immigration")that will
approve us to adopt internationally.
4.11 - Started dossier - this is an incredible number of documents that must be requested,
notarized, county certified, state certified, and then authenticated by the Guatemalan
Consulate in the US.
4.13 - Fingerprint appt USCIS
5.23 - Home study completed! - Our homestudy was a series of *more* documents, 20 pgs each
personal questions, 3 interviews (2 together; 1 separate), a home visit, and a class.

6.17 - Homestudy submitted to USCIS w/ mistakes- BIG mistakes! - Not pleased. On the cover
page my birth date and state are wrong, we were called "Aberson"(not
our last name), and more....
6.19 - All dossier documents collected! Whew! Now, to be authenticated.
6.19 - Correction to homestudy sent to USCIS and to us.
This week - I will run around to various county courthouses to have our documents certified on a county level. Next, I will take them to the Secretary of State and then to the Guatemalan Consulate - luckily, all in Atlanta.
Then, we wait for our I-171H (Notice of Favorable Determination Concerning our I-600A). Sadly, this is backed up in Atlanta right now. It will probably be the end of the summer before we get this. However, once we get this document, we are ready for our referral! So, not too long now, until we see (at least a picture) of our sweet little Guatemalan baby.